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| Words and photo by F LoBuono |
First, let me make one thing perfectly clear: I have a temper - and a fierce one at that. For all the writing that I do encouraging us to love one another, there are times when I could just explode! Yes, overall, I am good natured and fun loving. But, cross me and there could be consequences, serious consequences, to pay. My temper can be volcanic. And, it's wrong - just plain bad.
It's one of the things that I work hard to control. The path to a righteous life is not an easy one. In fact, generally, it seems much easier to yield to the baser human emotions like anger, greed, judgement, and jealousy. Since they are part of the human experience, and I an a human being, I am as guilty as anyone in exhibiting these emotions. I also feel that, before I can work on improving them (and I do), I must acknowledge their existence in me. I am also capable (as we all are) of kindness, compassion, and tolerance. The is the
yin-yang of the human experience - we are ALL of those things. We must learn to condition ourselves to reduce the baser, so-called "ugly" emotions like hatred and rage and increase the sublime ones like kindness and compassion. Sounds easy, right? It is not.
If you are a Facebook follower, as I am, then you are bound to see the plethora of horrible stories of murder, mayhem and abuse that inundate the news feed. Many of the most shocking of them involve crimes committed against children. Damn, it's easy to get angry at those who perpetrate crimes against those of us who are the most vulnerable. We want to see those people punished in the most heinous ways. I've read some of the most insidious (and creative) ways people would punish those who harm children (or animals). But, that would be wrong. Wait! What? Wrong? Wrong for making someone so despicable that they would harm a child suffer? How can that be? Well, it must be.
I am not suggesting that pedophiles go unpunished. That's ridiculous. Those who break the law must be punished to the fullest extent of the law. It's the
mindset behind the punishment that concerns me. When we hate those whose cause harm, justice is not served. Instead, our baser instinct of revenge becomes the motivating factor. This does a disservice not only to the original victim, but to society at large, as well. This strikes at the
spirit of the concept of justice, crime, and punishment. If we hate and abuse even those who hate and abuse are we TRULY any different? Is the cycle of violence being broken? Or, are we just perpetuating more hatred, more abuse, and more violence? Remember, there is an overwhelming body of evidence that suggests people who abuse children were taught this behavior by being abused as children in the first place. Therefore, it is all connected. The abusers are abused so they abuse and then we abuse them. There MUST be transcendence or it will never end.
Of course, this is a difficult concept to even grasp much less execute. When we read or hear of a child being hurt we want the culprit to pay, and pay dearly. We hope that the more severe the punishment, the more justice will be served. Perhaps, it may even prevent others from committing such abhorrent crimes. But does it really? We've been doing that for years and has it prevented child abuse? No, it has not. Now, it is difficult to say that we should "love" these people. That may be too much to ask of another human being, especially one who may have hurt you or a member of your family. But, this is what we must ASPIRE to. This is the transcendence that will set us free. And is difficult. In fact, it is more than difficult - it is divine.
Authors Note: Please keep in my that my heritage is Sicilian - the word "VENDETTA", i.e. the practice of seeking revenge against someone who has wronged you or your family, is a UNIQUELY Sicilian one.
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