Today's MOZEN: Time To Go

In just over 24 hours I will leave the CBS Broadcast Center on W57th in Manhattan for the last time. After 40+ years in the profession and 20 of those here, it's time to move on. The profession has changed. I have changed. What it once held for me no longer exists. It's time to concentrate my efforts elsewhere - even if that means simply sitting on my porch watching the world go by.

Of course, knowing with certainty for the last few weeks as to the actual date of my retirement has given me an opportunity to reflect on my career in the TV/News business. And, so I have. However, I am not an overly nostalgic person. It is what it is and it was what it was.

In fairness, the events I witnessed firsthand, particularly with CBS News, shaped me in immeasurable ways. I had the unmatched experience of having a front row seat of sorts at many of my generation's most defining moments, including: 911, a Space Shuttle launch and landing, many hurricanes and tornadoes, numerous political campaigns, the inauguration of our first black President, the election of a pope in Rome, and the marriage of prince and princess in London, among too many others to list.

However, I failed at my one most important goal; being a war correspondent/photographer. I felt the ultimate test for a journalist was to put your money where your mouth (or, pen or camera) is. Many of the journalists I admired most became so by covering human conflict. When the war in Iraq began I even volunteered to go there to cover the war. However, much to my surprise, there were so many other photojournalists with more seniority than I had in front of me that I was never chosen to go.

I also felt like I never achieved my full potential at CBS. I came in as a technician and that's the way that I will leave. I could have/would have done so much more if I only had the chance. Again, I don't want to sound ungrateful. I did have many incredible opportunities and earned a terrific living. And, it's not my way to live with regrets. Still, I feel like I left so much on the table. I just hope that through my work I made a difference in at least some peoples' lives.

But, I ain't dead yet AND I will leave on MY terms and there is always something to be said for that. I begin not only a new chapter in my life but, in many ways, a whole new book!

I even chose the 4th of July as my final day so that I could claim the firework displays were all in my honor - it suits my rather delicate ego.

Perhaps the greatest thing that I will take away from my time making television are the lasting friendships that I made with SO many people. There have been seemingly endless miles and countless smiles for me to hang my hat on - and, that ain't no trifling thing.

So, will I have a sense of ambivalence when that door closes behind me for the last time? Absolutely. I'll miss the challenge of providing a service that is essential to our liberty. It will be strange to be without the sights, sounds, and smells of a place that filled the better part of 20 years. And, of course, I will miss my comrades-in-arms and friends.  However, I won't miss the bizarre hours, the middle of the night phone calls, the horrible NYC traffic, and the poor quality that TV News now consists of.

So, I'll say it again - I AIN'T DEAD YET. And, as long as there is breath in my body, I will tell the stories that need to be told and, hopefully, continue to make a difference.