Today's MOZEN: "The Hunting Ground"

I recently watched CNN's broadcast of the controversial Academy Award nominated documentary The Hunting Ground. Written and directed by Kirby Dick, the film uses direct interviews with alleged victims of rape and sexual assaults on various college campuses to paint an ominous picture. It seems that sexual assaults, including rape, happen at an alarming rate at some of America's most prestigious universities including Harvard, Notre Dame, The University of North Carolina and others. One of the most damning cases involved Florida State University (FSU) and the star quarterback on its National Championship team, Jamis Winston. Winston was accused by fellow student, Erica Kinsman, of rape while they were both on campus. Winston has consistently claimed that the sex was consensual. Ms. Kinsman strongly denies this and reported the incident to school authorities immediately. Despite this, the Tallahassee Police did not begin to investigate the alleged crime until nearly a year later. By that time, evidence critical to the case was lost.

As is the ultimate reality in the great majority of these cases, it comes down to a "he said - she said" situation. Unless evidence can prove otherwise, it is difficult to win a prosecution in these type of situations. FSU, as is its right and duty, handled the case internally and ruled in favor of Winston. However, one thing most experts agree on here is that the investigation was VERY poorly executed from the very beginning. Since FSU handled the majority of the investigation, it is reasonable to assume a conflict of interest exists there. Could the school be expected to be completely impartial when it's very reputation, a National Championship worth millions to the school, AND the image of its Heisman Trophy winning quarterback were at stake? I think not. And, most agree with that assumption.

From my own experience as a college athlete, I KNOW that this behavior DOES exist. I wish to state here and now that I never personally engaged in this type of activity. I was taught much better than to fall into that sewer (more later). And, I never DIRECTLY witnessed a rape or sexual assault. However, I know that they happened. And, now, many years later, I realize how wrong it all was and how wrong I was to not actively do something about it.

When I was in college, I hung with a wild crowd. I mean these guys were fearless - physically, mentally, and emotionally. They were at the top of our game and sharp as razors. No one would fuck with them. And, these guys pushed the limit with everything they did. There seemed to be nothing they wouldn't do on a dare. I remember one night when someone challenged one of my them to throw a couch out of a 3rd floor dormitory window. Guess what went out the window?! I use the second person plural because I always felt that I was more of an observer than an active participant in their antics. This allowed me to do what I do best - take it all in a try to make sense of it all. It sure made for a wild ride.

One of the things that I did observe and always felt terrible about was their far too often boorish and brutal behavior towards women. One of the groups main goals was conquest, i.e. get laid. In fact, getting laid was the Holy Grail. And, often, it meant doing anything to accomplish that goal. It was a ball to the walls party with no holds barred. They were like sharks sensing blood. And, the prey were women. If a girl got too drunk at a frat party, she was labeled a loose women, a whore, and, therefore, was fair game. In fact, they had the attitude that it was OK to abuse her - she deserved it - dirty slut! And, it didn't happen just once or twice. It happened all of the time.

Now, I never knew of ANY women who reported this as abuse, assault, or rape. At least, I was never approached by anyone looking to investigate any reported cases. Does this mean the women never reported it for whatever reason they choose not to? Is it that the University failed to act on any accusations? I do not know and never will. It is too late now.

Even though I was attracted to these wild men, I NEVER felt comfortable with their attitude towards women. I was simply not raised that way. I have written on numerous occasions that I learned respect for women from BOTH of my parents. My father regularly spoke with me about violence against women. He would say, Frankie, women will make you angry. Very angry - so much so that you will want to strike. DON'T. NEVER raise you hands to a woman. It will do her and you no good.  My mother would add: Don't forget, you have a mother and a sister. ALL women deserve respect. It was a lesson learned early and has stayed with me my entire life.

So, why did I not speak out at the time when I KNEW it was wrong? I suppose there are many reasons: I wanted to be part of the gang. I rationalized that it was just normal, male hijinks - you know, boys will be boys. It was what we were supposed to do. And, maybe the girls WERE loose - good girls don't behave like that! Of course, these are just rationalizations. But, in fairness, I was young and didn't grasp the gravity of what they (we) were doing. It all seemed so normal.

Well, we know better now. And, we must DO better. Parents, TEACH you children well. Teach your boys to respect women - always. And, teach your girls to be vigilant.  The boys must learn that NO means NO - STOP. Girls must learn to control their own destiny by avoiding the pitfalls that can come with excessive drinking and partying. Both have so much to lose.

Today's MOZEN: Absolute Power Corrupts Absolutely.

Words and photo by F LoBuono

Power tends to corrupt and absolute power corrupts absolutely.

Lord Acton

This famous quote from Lord Acton (Sir John Dalberg-Acton, 8th Baronet, 1837-1902) was gleaned from a letter he wrote in April 1887 to religious scholar, Mandell Creighton. Creighton had argued in support of the Pope's infallibility and the so-called Divine Right of Kings. In essence, Lord Acton said POPPYCOCK - ALL men should be treated as equals and held to the same moral standards. The paragraph containing this immortal passage is quoted below:

But if we might discuss this point until we found that we nearly agreed, and if we do agree thoroughly about the impropriety of Carlylese denunciations and Pharisaism in history, I cannot accept your canon that we are to judge Pope and King unlike other men, with a favourable presumption that they did no wrong. If there is any presumption it is the other way, against the holders of power, increasing as the power increases. Historic responsibility has to make up for the want of legal responsibility. *Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Great men are almost always bad men, even when they exercise influence and not authority, still more when you superadd the tendency or the certainty of corruption by authority. There is no worse heresy than that the office sanctifies the holder of it. That is the point at which the negation of Catholicism and the negation of Liberalism meet and keep high festival, and the end learns to justify the means. You would hang a man of no position like Ravaillac; but if what one hears is true, then Elizabeth asked the gaoler to murder Mary, and William III. ordered his Scots minister to extirpate a clan. Here are the greatest names coupled with the greatest crimes; you would spare those criminals, for some mysterious reason. I would hang them higher than Haman, for reasons of quite obvious justice, still more, still higher for the sake of historical science.

What I find so interesting is that Lord Acton was a Roman Catholic and a member of England's ruling class. As such, one would think that he would be very much on the side of the Papists and Royalists. Obviously, he had the strength of character to see through this sham and expose it for the nonsense it is. His eloquence in stating his opposition to them made him immortal in a sense.

But, WHY does absolute power corrupt absolutely?

I believe it is so because it is within our very nature. Not all people lust for power. In fact, many eschew it. But, for most of us, the allure of authority, of being in charge, can prove irresistible. Even the shy ones among us, given the chance of wielding unquestioned power, can be corrupted by it.

Let me give an example.

My father was one of the most gentle, fair minded people that I have known in my life. So much so, that when he was a Deputy Sheriff assigned to the county jail and I would visit him, inmates would approach me saying, "your old-man is OK. He treats us with respect". My father would always follow up by teaching me that "to get respect, you must give it'. Still, even with that said, my father LOVED the power and authority that came with his badge and gun. And, he was not afraid to use it.

If you cut him off on the road, you were getting pulled over - whether he was in uniform or not. Period. We could be dressed in our Sunday best on our way to grandma's house for dinner when someone would do something he perceived not so much as illegal as disrespectful (like cut in front of our car without using a turn signal) and he would start a ruckus. He would drive up as close as possible to the "perpetrator's" window and scream "PULL OVER" while flashing his badge. He was going to teach them to respect him and what he perceived as the law. And, he did it all of the time. Embarrassed the shit out of us. It would drive my mother crazy and she would chastise him every time that he did it: "Joe, stop it! It's none of your business. You're embarrassing yourself AND us". My father didn't care. He felt he had the authority to do it. Whether it was his responsibility to do it is another matter. I believe that he did it because he COULD. That gun and badge always made him feel like King Kong!

From my experience, this behavior happens especially to people who are not "born" into the privilege of power. When so-called ordinary people are given extraordinary amounts of authority and the power behind hit, I believe that they get "drunk" with it. And, the more they get, the more authoritarian they become. That gun and badge are symbols of the power of authority, making them especially intoxicating. That's an awful lot of clout in the hands of an individual who is not used to having it. And, the more you get, the more the feeling multiplies - until you get to the very top, i.e. Papal Infallibility and The Divine Right of Kings.

And, the system supports it. I believe that this is the case with many of the recent civilian killings by the police. Although many of the shootings may be seen as justified, there are many others where people were killed simply because they did not comply with "instructions" by the police, even when the person has not exhibited violent behavior. Instead, they had the audacity to question the authority of the police. You are challenging their authority and that will be met with the full force of that authority. And, this behavior has not been limited to human victims, either. There have been a slew of cases where the police have shot a family's dog for "menacing", even without proof. Sadly, these cases are rarely prosecuted. The police simply use their POWER and hide behind their BLUE WALL - the ultimate symbol of CORRUPT POWER.

Of course, abuse of power is not limited to the police. It seems to be ubiquitous in our modern society. It is everywhere: politics, religion, Wall St. Apparently, it is part of the human condition. If it were not so, it wouldn't continue to happen - over and over again.

So, what do we do about it?

All men, if created equal, must be judged equally. Lord Acton: I cannot accept your canon that we are to judge Pope and King unlike other men, with a favourable presumption that they did no wrong. If there is any presumption it is the other way, against the holders of power, increasing as the power increases. Historic responsibility has to make up for the want of legal responsibility.

What Lord Acton is saying is we cannot let those corrupted by absolute power rule over us. In fact, those in power hold a greater responsibility towards equanimity. They MUST be held accountable! Avaricious bankers, dishonest politicians, abusive police, pedophile priests, pedantic bureaucrats, and the like must be seen for who and what they are: liars and phonies. No man is greater or less than any other. We ALL need to act like it.

FOR 2016

Words and photo by F LoBuono

The world is a hard place and NYC can be one of the hardest. Well documented, the pace of New York is second to none. It can be a 24-7-365 grind. It seems everyone is hustling just to stay alive.

On my way to a local deli to pick up some coffee, I noticed a flock of pigeons bathing and "dinning" in some fetid water left over from the last storm. They pecked at every scrap that might be something edible. The horse drawn carriages were lazily making there way up 10th Avenue from their stables on the West side to take up their positions in Central Park. All "gussied up" for the Holidays, they trudged up the long incline to service the thousands of tourists who eagerly await their arrival to take them on romantic rides through the park. A sea of yellow - the famous (or infamous, depending on your POV) fleet of taxis flanked the horses for the trip up 10th Ave., every one of them working 12 hours/day to hustle a buck. It NEVER stops. It is truly the City that never sleeps.

These are just the smaller issues that affect New Yorkers on a daily basis. It does not include the incredibly high cost of living here. Food can be SO expensive and an apartment worse. Crime and the threat of terrorism are never far from our consciousness - not that it slows us down! Noise, air, and water pollution surround us. Traffic can be a nightmare.

So, you may ask why would anyone in their right mind even ATTEMPT to live in such a severe place?

Well, because NYC is the best metaphor for LIFE itself. The challenges that we face are balanced by the incredible energy and beauty that can be found here, as well. The competition that drives this City, often to distraction, is also a catalyst for great creative energy. New York, on balance, may be the most accomplished city in the world. More extraordinary things are envisioned and executed here than anywhere else on the planet. We are the financial capital of the world, the media capital of the world, and, arguably, the food capital, too. The will to achieve is strong in New Yorkers.

And, despite the obvious grit and grime, New York is also a place of great physical beauty. I have driven over the George Washington Bridge (THE busiest bridge in the world) thousands of times. And, yet, every time that I make the long, winding turn off the bridge and on to the West Side Highway, I marvel at the spectacular vista of the mighty Hudson, flowing like molten silver in the early morning sun, flanked on one side by the canyons created by the City's awesome skyline and on the other by the cliffs of the mighty Palisades (one of the most unique natural structures in the world) - EVERY SINGLE TIME. It is never just "there". Sunsets on Rockaway Beach are nothing short of breathtaking. Central Park, covered in freshly fallen snow (before the traffic turns it into black soot), allows one to revel in pristine nature, all while surrounded by the most frenetic city in the world. Times Square, lit up brighter than a Madam LeRue Pinball Machine, is called The Crossroads of the World for a reason.

Again, these are just a few of the gems offered by The Big Apple.

To succeed in New York is to succeed in life - and vice versa. Again, the key is BALANCE. We cannot ignore the ugly. We cannot (and should not) look past it. It is a part of life. We cannot know joy fully until we experience sorrow, as well. We need to accept that suffering is a part of the world. But, we must (and should) do everything within our power to alleviate that suffering. Part of the process should be an acknowledgement of the beauty and kindness within our world, too. Allow that goodness to penetrate and move us. Let it fill us with the power of love - for the world, our brothers and sisters, and ourselves.

May you and yours experience the fullness of life - in ALL its manifestation - and bring all the love you can muster to the coming New Year.

HAPPY 2016

Today's NOT TOO TRUE STORY: A Christmas Long, Long Ago

Words and photos by F LoBuono

It was a lifetime ago and yet the memory is still vivid - in a vault that my mind uses to store the precious moments in my life. I can smell her hair and feel her gentle embrace. It was Christmas eve and we were alone for the first time. She lived in the basement apartment directly below the one I shared with a crazy Irishmen named Tom O'Brien. Hard drinking, hard living, his Celtic energy provided the perfect compliment to my Latin ethos. We became brothers-in-arms. We had been living on the main floor of a 3-story home. Two young women lived up stairs when Sarah Smith moved into the basement apartment a few months later.

Sarah was just about the same age as Tom and I. We also had a lot in common, not the least of which was that we were all from northern New Jersey and had similar upbringings. What made Sarah so different from me was that she was so white. By that I mean, she was White - Anglo - Saxon and Protestant. And, she looked it; blond, fair, and freckled. She could also act the part, too. But, she also had a wild side that belied her conservative looks. I found that very appealing and, after a few weeks at the house, I found myself attracted to her.

However, there was one caveat: she was attracted to Tom and not me! It seemed to me that Sarah was more attracted to Tom because, culturally, they had more in common. I think that my "dark energy" intimidated her. Whatever the reason, I sensed the situation called for some tact (not my strongest suit but, necessary). I waited and watched. I let life unfold at its own pace (for a change).

We were all great friends and nothing came romantically between Sarah and Tom. Apparently, Tom was not interested in her, at least romantically. So, the three of us became a sort of benign, unrequited manage-a-trois! 

That all changed rather suddenly and dramatically one Christmas Eve. Tom had some family obligations and was not going to be at the apartment for a couple of days. Sarah and I were done for the time being with our commitments and were spending time alone at the house. Our apartments were connected by a door leading to a long, straight stairway. We were all so friendly that the door was virtually never locked and often open - literally. So, it was the case that night. When I found out that Sarah was home, she invited me down to spread a little Christmas cheer. A nice bottle of red whine and some delicious cheese was awaiting me. We shared the wine and some great conversation. It was all so warm and wonderful. It was a moment in time when all seemed right with the world.

After finishing off the bottle and the cheese, we proceeded to lie down on the bed together. Slightly buzzed and glowing with good feelings towards one another AND the world, we continued our conversation. Side by side, fully clothed, there was nothing overtly sexual in our behavior. Even though I was attracted to her, it was not my intention to "bed her".

Having exhausted the conversation, we found ourselves spent as well. I rolled over and hugged her tightly. It was so right at that moment that she did not resist at all. In fact, she returned my embrace. And, we stayed that way for what felt like forever. At some point, I kissed her gently. She returned my affection with kisses of her own. We continued to embrace, still fully clothed. I stroked her gently. At no time did our encounter become sexual. It was ALL feeling and tenderness.

After a long period of blissful silence, Sarah said, You are the most gentle man I have ever known.

I did not respond verbally. Instead, I kissed her again and embraced her even more closely. At that one moment in time, I don't think that I ever loved anyone more.

We eventually spent the night together - sleeping in comfort with the knowledge that we were safe in each other's arms. It was warm and wonderful.

When we woke we basked in the glow of our new-found relationship and had breakfast together. We would become lovers and almost did spend our lives together. After about a year together, we got engaged to be married. But, it was not to be. It turned out that we WERE just too different. Sarah got cold feet and called it all off. She eventually married another and, after many years, they are still together. I went on to get married, without the same degree of success as she. But, I make no excuses. I've always lived my life without them - and, still do!

But, I'll never forget that Christmas Eve all those years ago. Magic happened in a way that can only happen on just such a day. . .

MERRY CHRISTMAS ALL - MAY YOU SPEND IT IN BLISS AND PEACE.

Today's MOZEN: Be Careful What You Wish For!

Words and photo by F LoBuono

When I was a kid I knew that I would never work a 9-5 job. Like most, I had dreams of accomplishing many things in my life that didn't involve sitting in a suit and tie at an office all day. I was going to be a ball player or a research scientist or a deckhand on a freighter sailing around the world or a fighter pilot or a doctor or, maybe, even President - anything but living a standard 9-5 existence. In the ultimate irony I virtually never saw myself in my current (and lifelong) profession- the TV News business!

Well, one thing DID come to pass - I most certainly do not work a 9-5 job. In fact, at this point of my 30 plus year career I have worked virtually every shift BUT 9-5! As a so-called freelance worker in TV News, broadcasters feel free to give you whatever hours that THEY need filled, regardless of what YOUR needs may be. That's just how it is. And, I accept that. So, you get schedules like the one I have this week -

5 days, working 5 different shifts. AND, by the time I am done, I will have worked EVERY hour of the day: 12 am-8 am, 4 am-4 pm, 4 pm-12 am, 10 am-6 pm, and 8 am-4 pm.

So, what is the lesson here? Well, to answer I'll have to use one of my favorite hackneyed  phrases:

Be careful what you wish for. You just may get it!

Have a wonderful day Holiday Season and *KEEP ON WISHIN'!!!!!

*But, be careful for what that may be! :)

TalkFrank - A HOLIDAY MESSAGE 2015.

Words and photo by F LoBuono

Despite nine years (Kindergarten and grades 1-8)) of intense religious education at Madonna Parochial School in Fort Lee, NJ, I am not particularly devout. I am certainly well indoctrinated to the teachings of the Catholic Church because of it but, I just don't adhere to them very much. Doesn't work for me. Now, that does not mean that I am not spiritual. Because I am intensely so. I am a deep thinker and regularly probe the mysteries of the Universe - WHO are we? WHY are we? Is there an afterlife, etc., etc.? I ask all the questions that men have been asking for eternity. And, just like the rest, sometimes, I get answers. Often, I do not. So, I keep searching.

My parents played somewhat opposite but key roles in the formation of my thinking. My father could have been described as a traditionalist when it came to his faith. He dressed in his finest suit every Sunday to attend mass and rarely missed a service. He even became a deacon at the church. And, he loved it. On the other side was my mother, Stella. Stella NEVER went to church - ever - not on Christmas or Easter. Never. Now, that's not to say she isn't spiritual. She most certainly is. She prays regularly - in her own way. She has just never felt the need to listen to anyone else tell her WHO or HOW or WHERE she should worship. She always taught me that if your heart is in the right place, you have found your religion and your temple.

So, I combine the two philosophies: I have a sound basis in traditional religious thinking and apply that in a way that suits my search to find my heart in the right place.

With that in mind, I wish to extend a MERRY CHRISTMAS to all. Although traditionally the celebration of the birth of Jesus, therefore making it a Christian holiday, I believe it transcends "religion". The Christ came with a message for ALL. It is universal. His divinity is irrelevant to me. The MESSAGE is not. It is simple, direct, sublime:

                           PEACE ON EARTH. GOOD WILL TO ALL MANKIND.

This is the time of year we have chosen to celebrate the Word made Flesh - THOSE words.This,to me, means that the concepts of love, forgiveness, compassion, and wholeness have transcended from ideas into form. And, that form is embodied in The Christ - Jesus.

That's all the religion you will need. The hype surrounding the holiday is simply that - hype. See the season for what it truly represents and leave the rest behind. Christmas spirit is not something you drink or buy. May the real meaning of this season, steeped in the tradition of love and giving, sustain you and your families throughout this and all the years to come.

Today's MOZEN: The Choice is Ours

F LoBuono

A battle rages.  Within a short drive from my apartment a fierce struggle that will have national implications is being waged between the residents of the Town of Ramapo and it's own School Board. It seems that the majority of students within the district who attend the public schools are minorities. The School Board is dominated by ultra-orthodox Jews (Hasidim) who's children attend private religious schools known as Yeshivas. Therefore, the Board has no vested interest in funding the public schools. Instead, they devote most of the money to the Yeshivas, benefiting their "own". The results for the public schools are disastrous. Most of the physical plant has been allowed to decay. Virtually all of the enrichment programs and many after-school activities have been cancelled. The children suffer. It's a mess.

On the surface, it may seem an easy "WTF, let's fix this"! Well, it's not that simple. The School Board was LEGALLY elected. The ultra-orthodox communities here, and elsewhere, vote as a single unit. Collectively it is known as The Block Vote. It is self explanatory. And, it is PERFECTLY legal. In some ways, it is even brilliant. The members of those communities understand the power of the vote and use it to get what they want. We should ALL be as determined and united in the causes that we are passionate about. Instead, so-called "Main Street America" voted at a rate of about 55% in the last Presidential election. That's pathetic - and, you get what you pay for.

However, the question remains, is it moral? Is right, proper and EFFECTIVE to isolate your community, live mainly by your own rules and, basically, not give a shit as to what happens to your neighbor? I think that most of us would answer that question negatively. The State of NY agreed and appointed an Independent Monitor to over-see the Board. After the Board agreed to the monitoring, they voted to deny the Monitor veto power over their decisions, thereby rendering him virtually powerless. The State believes that it has the right to force the Board to accept the decisions of the Monitor in their entirety. It's a fight that may go all the way to the Supreme Court.

I believe that there are two lessons to be learned here. First, isolation of ANY community based on it's ethnic or religious make-up, by that community ITSELF or by others is not only wrong, it is counter productive. Isolation of ANY group is contrary to the very core beliefs of what it means to be American. We are the UNITED States of America. To exist that way we MUST stick together. Of course, there will always be differences in opinion. That, as well, is part of the American ethos. But, there cannot be isolation of any group - by that group or by others who would force that isolation. So, the idea of SEPARATING of Muslims from the rest of America is contrary to the very ideals the Hawks in our Country are so eager to fight for!! It's like eating your own children.

The second point to be made is to once again emphasize the power of the VOTE. We can disapprove of what is happening in Ramapo while at the same time realizing that they TAKE power because they vote. There is no excuse not to. The results are right in front of us to clearly see. If an idea fails it's because we have allowed it to fail by not exercising, again, the most American of RIGHTS - to vote.

Today's MOZEN: To Be Like Frank

F LoBuono

It seems that we have a lot more in common that our first names. Perhaps, that is why I have always been fascinated with Frank Sinatra.

But there's more to it than just a shared moniker. There are other similar elements to our story.

Sinatra's father's family comes from the same village in Sicily as my father's, Lercara Friddi. Located near Palermo, it is an ancient town steeped in history and tradition. Their is no question in my mind that the fact that Sinatra had a Sicilian soul contributed to his intensity and, therefore, his legendarily mercurial personality (more on this subject later). Although thoroughly American, I, too, identify with the depth of the Sicilian soul. Sicily is a place noted for both its savagery and beauty. That dichotomy is in our blood. And, he was a "Jersey kid" from Hoboken. I grew up in Fort Lee. Coincidentally, his parents eventually moved to Fort Lee. He was painfully thin most of his life. I, also, have had a tendency to be thin. In fact, as a young man playing sports, I always struggled to keep my weight up.

Of course, we part ways when comparing our talents. Sinatra, quite simply, is unmatched as a performer. When he sang, it was instantly recognized. NO ONE sounded like Sinatra. Those who knew him said he was never more honest than when he sang. He BECAME the song. It came from his heart and soul. People gravitated to this honesty. It made him a superstar! It has also been said that he lived his personal life that way, too. If he liked you, there was no end to the depth of his giving and compassion. Despite his enormous success, he always made his friends feel as if they were the important ones. On the other side of that coin, if he didn't like you, his anger could be just as intense. Once he cut you out of his life, you simply did not exist to him. This is part of the Sicilian Soul that I mentioned before. There is an intensity to it that is palpable.

In my mind, his acting was just as brilliant as his singing. He poured ALL of himself into every role. Just as with his crooning, he was as honest as he could possibly be. His Academy Award winning role in "From Here To Eternity" is just one of his many brilliant performances. He held nothing back. It was ALL or NOTHING AT ALL. There was no room for compromise. His approach to excellence was apparent not only in his performing but in everything he did. His attention to detail was legendary. He felt it was his responsibility to give everything that he had to anything he felt worth doing. It could make him difficult. But, as in the case with most geniuses, people realized that the end (his brilliance) justified the means.

But, Sinatra was far more than a mere entertainer. He was a cultural phenomenon. He could influence everything from style to Presidential elections! And, he was not shy about that ability. In fact, he used it to foster causes, like Civil Rights, that were dear to his heart. When Sammy Davis, Jr. married Brit Eckland (a white woman) it caused a furor. Many of Davis' friends abandoned him. Not Sinatra. No. Sinatra was loyal to a fault. When Davis was shunned by nightclub owners, Sinatra exerted his influence to make sure that Davis would still find work. He campaigned tirelessly for a young John F. Kennedy because he believed that Kennedy would bring the social changed needed in the Country at the time. Again, in classic Sinatra fashion, when Kennedy eventually spurned him, in a fit of rage, he completed excised Kennedy from his life (again, VERY Sicilian).

His talent, style and influence could only be surpassed by his compassion. In a recent interview, Jerry Lewis called Sinatra the most compassionate and complete person he has ever known. In fact, he even called him "Messiah-like". To illustrate his point he related this story: Sinatra informed Lewis to grab his tuxedo and meet him at Sinatra's private plane at 7 pm. Apparently, Sinatra had gotten wind of a story about the widow of fireman killed in the line of duty in Richland, Ohio and was struggling to make ends meet. Sinatra's plan was to rent out a local arena to put on a fund raising show that night with Sinatra and Lewis as the headliners. Of course, without question, Lewis complied. At his own expense, and WITHOUT fanfare, Sinatra rented the arena, brought in a 35 piece orchestra with all the associated technical talent, and raised over $350,000 dollars for that widow! He did things like this on a regular basis.

Sinatra could also be petty and stubborn. These, too, are traits of the Sicilian Soul. There is a depth to it that allows for both the warmest compassion and the cruelest callousness. Compromise is not easily come by. In Sinatra's case the combination worked brilliantly. Sinatra was always Sinatra.

In this, the 100th year of his birth, we celebrate his extraordinary life and accomplishments. We laud the good and look past the bad. And, it reminds me that I need to share more with Frank than a first name and a culture - I need to BE like Frank.

Today's MOZEN: The Folly of War

F LoBuono

War is ALWAYS evil.

They call us The Greatest Generation. Well, I don't know how many of the Greatest Generation really had any idea of the impact their actions would have on the world. None of them, really.

In the fox hole next to me was a young farm boy from Mississippi who had no idea of what he was fighting for. He didn't even know where the hell he was. He was never out of Mississippi. Never off the farm. Never on a train before the Army. Nothing great about him - just a simple farm boy. Suddenly, out of the mist, a bullet comes out of nowhere and hits him in the head, killing him instantly.

Was he great? Yes. But, he was really just a boy . . .
                                                                      * Jack Warner, WWII Veteran, 7th Infantry Division

So many lost to the beast. MUST it be????????????????


* Jack Warner was an Austrian Jew who emigrated to this Country from his native land at the age of 19. He saw the horrors caused by the hate of the Nazis firsthand before he came to this Country and decided to do something about it by joining the Army. He knew the great evil had to be stopped. Ironically, he fought against the Japanese in the Pacific as a combat engineer rather than the Nazis in Europe. He did his duty and never regretted doing what had to be done. But, he never forgot the HORROR that is war.

Today's Photo Gallery: The People of Istanbul

People are always just people. Here are just a few that we met in Istanbul, one of the world's greatest cities. What a wonderful and diverse culture. It may be an Islamic country but it still boasts a wonderful diversity, proving that, yes, we CAN get along!

Today's MOZEN: To Be, Or Not To Be.

F LoBuono

To be, or not to be, that is the question:
Whether 'tis Nobler in the mind to suffer
The Slings and Arrows of outrageous Fortune,
Or to take Arms against a Sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them: to die, to sleep
No more; and by a sleep, to say we end
The Heart-ache, and the thousand Natural shocks
That Flesh is heir to? 'Tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wished. To die, to sleep,
To sleep, perchance to Dream; aye, there's the rub,
For in that sleep of death, what dreams may come,
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause. There's the respect
That makes Calamity of so long life:
For who would bear the Whips and Scorns of time,
The Oppressor's wrong, the proud man's Contumely, [F: poor]
The pangs of despised Love, the Law’s delay, [F: disprized]
The insolence of Office, and the Spurns
That patient merit of the unworthy takes,
When he himself might his Quietus make
With a bare Bodkin? Who would Fardels bear, [F: these Fardels]
To grunt and sweat under a weary life,
But that the dread of something after death,
The undiscovered Country, from whose bourn
No Traveller returns, Puzzles the will,
And makes us rather bear those ills we have,
Than fly to others that we know not of.
Thus Conscience does make Cowards of us all,And thus the Native hue of Resolution
Is sicklied o'er, with the pale cast of Thought,
And enterprises of great pitch and moment, [F: pith]
With this regard their Currents turn awry, [F: away]
And lose the name of Action. Soft you now,
The fair Ophelia? Nymph, in thy Orisons
Be all my sins remembered.^[4]

This is the full text from Hamlet's soliloquy in Shakespeare's play of the same name. I have highlighted what I believe to be the key passages. The first, To be, or not to be, that is the question, is certainly one of the most quoted phrases in the English language. But, how many of us REALLY understand what it means. It has been quoted so many times, in fact, that we seldom think of the implication of the words. When heard in context with the rest of the soliloquy, we understand that Hamlet is a man in crisis. He has been confronted by a great wrong and is so concerned about dealing with it that he feels the only way to solve the problem is to avoid it completely, even until his own death, i.e. commit suicide. He knows the road to resolution will not be an easy one. But, he also reasons that if he fights hard enough, he just might win. Ah, what to do?!

As he continues, he weighs his options and, in a sense, he comes up with the conclusion that the devil you know is better to deal with than the one you don't. He reasons that should he kill himself he has no idea WHAT lies ahead. And, the thought of not knowing what lies in that great void terrifies him to the point that nothing on this earth can frighten him more than the his fear of the unknown. Plus, he knows that sometimes dreams can become reality. And, he worries that if he ends his life too soon he may never be able to actually LIVE his dreams. So, we all strive to live a long live, putting up with all the trials and tribulations associated with it for the CHANCE to fulfill our destiny  - Thus Conscience does make Cowards of us all - we often live without taking chances.

Of course, only Shakespeare could frame that argument so articulately. That's why he's SHAKESPEARE. However, I believe that we have all felt that way in our lives. Perhaps, we have not gone so far as to contemplate suicide but I'm SURE that virtually all of us, at one time or another, have said - SCREW THIS. I'M DONE! Considering the amount of writing that I do, especially on controversial topics, I'm bound to create conflict. And, I most certainly do. People take pot shots at me all of the time. I get it. In fact, I usually welcome it. It's important for my personal growth to be challenged. I remember an interview with Arnold Schwarzenegger where he discussed the pain associated with his intense workouts. He said he does it because you can't grow without burning. Of course, he was referring to his muscles but the same philosophy can be applied to our mental state, as well. It's important that we stretch our minds by discussing topics with people who's opinions may differ greatly from our own.

But, there is more to taking on your critics than just for mental exercise. We must have the courage of our convictions - always. We must take arms against a Sea of troubles, and by opposing end them. In fact, I believe there is a moral imperative that we do. To not ACTIVELY speak against injustice, bigotry, and hate is as wrong as those who perpetrate those memes in the first place! We cannot sit idly by while others spew a doctrine of fear of loathing. At least, I will NOT!

Look, I'm not right all of the time. No one is. But, I have a strong sense of moral justice that I believe has a place in this world. And, I have no tolerance for intolerance! Everyone is entitled to an opinion and I respect that. In fact, I do more than just respect it. I would fight for your right to have one. Still, with that said, having an opinion does not bestow on you the right to spew hate, abuse, and fear. If you do, I will call you out over it - always!!

There are so many times when I would like to just quit - to say SCREW THIS - and just write happy horseshit all of the time. But, that's not my nature. I was not taught that way and I do not live that way either. I would never be able to dream - because I would not be able to sleep. And, I dream of a world that is free from the fear and loathing - and I'm willing to fight for it.

The ultimate tragedy is not the oppression and cruelty by the bad people but the silence over that by the good people.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/m/martinluth390143.html#tatzQ3eYLz0lA2b4.99

When You Think About It: In Our Own Best Interest

Words and photo by F LoBuono

Indulge me (and forgive me, Mr.Shakespeare), if you please:

Friends. Americans. Countrymen. Lend me your ears. . . your hearts, your minds, and your very souls.

I fear for the fate of our Country and the world. The irrational forces of evil are marshaling and, perhaps, winning. They are poised to strike not only from afar, but from within our own society itself. The world seems as if it is being consumed by hate on every level. Where we once seemed mostly immune, we are again thrust into the very center of the maelstrom.

The voices of reason and compassion are being drowned out by those of hate and terror. Logic and prudence have been replaced by avarice and execration. Religious fanatics have hijacked their respective faiths, leaving no room for the belief of others. Civil discourse has been supplanted by anonymous Internet blather.

Fear and loathing reigns!

Once again, America has been stung by wanton violence. The latest mass murder in San Bernadino, Ca. raised a whole host of issues plaguing us AND the world at large. First, there is the issue of terrorism. We have not been spared the horror that has affected many of our European allies. This, despite the fact that one of the terrorists was American born, has, once again, raised mostly irrational fears of refugee migration from the war-torn Middle East. The knee jerk reaction, fueled by the GOP candidates for President and led most loudly by Donald Trump, is to hold an entire culture and religion responsible for the acts of the minority. This is not to say there is NOT an issue with radical Islam. There is. And, it is significant. However, when we fall victim to the darker angels of our nature and blame ALL, we do nothing to solve the problem. In fact, we exacerbate it by doing EXACTLY what our enemies hoped we would do - create a whole new generation of disenfranchised people, eager to join "the Dark Side".

Second, and, perhaps, the most "American" issue raised was that of Gun Control. As has been the case in the aftermath of the seemingly endless spate of mass shootings, the debate over guns and what place they have in our society rages. From the research that I have conducted, it appears to me that most Americans favor changes in the current gun control laws. These changes include:

• closing the so-called loop holes found in purchasing weapons at gun shows
• banning certain ammunition that is particularly deadly
• restricting access to "assault style" weapons
• banning high capacity magazines. 

Again, from my research, I DO NOT find that Americans support a total BAN on weapons, nor have I found ANY evidence that the government intends to take anyone's guns away! Despite this, the gun fanatics, led by the NRA, refuse to even consider ANY compromise, hiding behind THEIR interpretation of the 2nd Amendment. Frankly, I find their zeal nothing short of frightening. They see shadowy government figures lurking in dark offices waiting for the opportunity to come and get their guns. I see that as paranoia. Any move at sensible compromise is seen as the first step in the eradication of a dearly held American tradition and RIGHT -  to bear arms.

Now, given that right, and I will "give" it (for what that's worth), I still don't understand our OBSESSION with guns AND violence. And, they are inextricably linked. The ultimate goal in the use of a gun, whether in hunting, protection, or policing, produces violence - something/someone is going to be likely killed or injured - good guy or bad. That's the ultimate reality of a firearm. So, why do we WORSHIP them? They seem to be part of our collective consciousness. I have written many times on this blog that virtually every conflict we see on TV. the movies, or in electronic games is solved at the end of a gun. And, we LOVE it.

And, it's even more than that. Our obsession with guns and violence is almost sexual in nature. Many seem to experience a type of sexual satisfaction in the power that comes with possessing a weapon. A scrawny boy with a Glock .40 ain't so weak any more. And, he wants the world to know it. It's almost an extension of his dick! I suppose that seems to explain why the GREAT majority of gun violence is carried out by men.

Some gun enthusiasts have even argued with me over minutia like the difference between fully- automatic and semi-automatic when the only important detail is that the weapon is a powerful killing machine. They are blinded by their allegiance to their cause.

I, for one, am not interested in taking away anyone's guns. And, I am not longer willing to debate the 2nd Amendment. That genie is long out of the bottle. I also DO NOT believe that we can ERADICATE gun violence. Violence, unfortunately, is as much a part of the human experience as is love. However, I DO believe that there are ways to minimize that violence. I gave some practical steps highlighted above.

But, I also believe that there is more that we can do. These things are of a more ethereal nature because they require a change in heart. All the laws in the world can't stop people with hate in their hearts. We must find the courage to reject hate and accept the power of love. And, it is so damned hard to do! We fear that if we allow ourselves to be kind, others will take advantage. This is human nature. That's why it is DIVINE to attempt to live this way. It is an effort to elevate our consciousness to a higher plane of existence. THIS is the goal of ALL spirituality. And, if it were easy, we'd all be saved! But, we must try.

For hate it a beast that only gets stronger when we feed it more hate.

As most of my readers know, my favorite Super Hero character is The Incredible Hulk. I relate to the fact the he is a mostly misunderstood brute. Be that as it may, there is one thing about the character that has relevance to our conversation. The more hate and anger your hurl at him the more powerful he becomes. It only feeds the beast. So, it is in life. Hate is like a living thing and it needs to be fed. It is nourished by ignorance, intolerance, bigotry, sexism, and greed. Anger and hate never rewards or heals. It ONLY creates more of the same, only worse. It's the proverbial "Catch-22".

When You Think About It, it is in our own best advantage to practice compassion and mindfulness. The alternative is a circular road to ruin.

Today's MOZEN: CHOICES!!!!!!

F LoBuono

In the current version of the USA vs NRA, allow me to sum it up like this:

Asking for more time to get gun control legislation "right" is like asking a dying person to give you more time to get dialing 9-1-1 "right"!

After watching the new GOP Speaker of the House, Rep. Paul Ryan, being interviewed by a morning news show my reaction was visceral. In street vernacular, I wanted to hurl! He couldn't have been more evasive about taking a true, strong stance on what America needs to do with its rampant mass shooting, i.e. gun issues.

When pressed by the reporters, including Charlie Rose, he continually hid under the mantle of the Constitution and "Due Process". He was asked, in light of the MOST recent mass gun murder in San Bernadino, Ca., why he should not, as the new leader of Congress, use the opportunity to meet with a willing President and TAKE ACTION! Ryan's response: (paraphrasing) "We need to honor the Constitution and the rights of law abiding American citizens and avoid 'knee jerk' reactions". He went on the encourage "restraint". Although this sounds great in theory (protecting the rights of Americans), in practice it means taking NO action because his core base, supported by the NRA, says so!

Again, excuse the vernacular, but HOLY SHIT? Are you KIDDING me? Restraint? How many more Americans have to die before he, and HIS PARTY, grow the balls to take on the NRA and pass REASONABLE GUN CONTROL LEGISLATION!!

Rep. Ryan also stressed the need for more "mental health legislation" to "close loop holes" on allowing the "mentally ill" to purchase weapons. Well, here's ANOTHER WTF? Again, this is a cop out. Of course, we could ALWAYS use improvement in our mental health system. We know that it is in serious need of repair. Well, are the Paul Ryans of the world (i.e. the GOP) the ones that make passing funding for issues like Health Care virtually impossible? So, it's double speak. Something, unfortunately, the photogenic Mr. Ryan seems particular good at. He proved himself, and his party, as being completely out of touch with MOST Americans (who favor reasonable gun control).

And, it's sad . . .

Here is an opportunity for a reconciliation between two parties gulfs apart. An olive branch has been offered by the President. And, once again, he has been rebuked. We need to "wait" longer so the GOP can think more about it.

We have choices to make and soon, Thank god! Those choices are clear. And, Rep. Ryan has just made them crystal.

What type of Country do WE want us to be? The Right is always CRYING that we never get shit done as a Country - we've become weaklings! Well, I know LEADERS who are willing to make the REAL changes necessary to give US OUR Country back again!!!

Today's MOZEN: Fear and Loathing in America Strikes Again!

F LoBuono

Maybe it's me. In fact, I'm sure that it is. But, I still just don't get it. I have a good life. I am not rich or famous but I do OK. I own my own house. And, it's a pretty big house, too. I have a beautiful apartment.I eat well. I have a decent vehicle - old with plenty of mileage, but reliable - like its owner. I am in good health. I have steady work and make a good living. And, most importantly, I feel FREE. I travel pretty much unfettered. I say and write whatever suits me, unafraid of censorship or retribution. Life in America is still pretty damned good.

At least it is for me.

Yet, there are many with circumstances similar to mine who feel in peril. They see villains lurking at the highest level of government (including the President) whose only goal is to pass legislation to screw them. Their personal liberties are seen to be in serious jeopardy. It's a mindset that takes hold and never lets go. To use the term popularized by Dr. Gonzo himself, Hunter S. Thompson, they suffer from a paranoia that he called Fear and Loathing*. They fear and loath what they don't understand or agree with. They fret that the Country is on the road to ruin. Here are some of the possible reasons.

First, there is a totally irrational fear that the government is coming for their guns. ANY regulation of a weapon is seen as an infringement of personal liberty, one that will lead to tyranny.

Well, no matter how you interpret the 2nd Amendment, NO ONE is coming to take your guns! Yes, most Americans would like to see reasonable gun control (ALL opposed by the NRA) but also realize that when it comes to guns, that genie is out of the bottle. And, it ain't goin' back. Your guns will NOT be taken. No jack booted thugs are coming to your door to haul you off to some gulag after they've confiscated your guns. There is absolutely no evidence that this is happening. And, it simply never will. To think otherwise IS paranoia.

Then, there is the notion that the FACT the world's environment is changing, and not for the better, is nothing more than a plot by the government to control BIG BUSINESS and raise taxes. As I write this post, leaders from all of the world are meeting in Paris to discuss what most of them believe to be one of the most pressing problems of our time - global climate change. It has become OBVIOUS, and is supported by an overwhelming amount of scientific data, that the world's climate is changing in such a way as to put life on earth in peril. Yet, there are those who deny this science. Again, they see it as another way to for the government to put its hand in their pockets by diverting money away from Big Business and towards a global solution to the problem. However, without fresh air to breath or clean water to drink no amount of BUSINESS will be able to save us.

So, damn it, no one is taking your GUNS or your fair share of MONEY!

We could go on with the paranoid fear and loathing - e.g.The Syrian refugees. Despite the fact that most terrorist acts committed in this Country are perpetrated by native born Americans, those suffering with this condition see a terrorist lurking behind every Syrian widow and orphan. Their paranoia blinds them and prevents them from seeing the reality that inhibiting their entry is not only un-American, it plays right into the hands of the enemy we seek to destroy - ISIS.

They want government our of their lives - except when it suits them. For example, the issue of a women's choice and abortion: those who fear and loath don't want the government regulating business, guns, the economy, or the environment. These are seen as intrusions into personal liberties. Then, these same people would deny a woman the right to choose what is best for her own body by having the government regulate it. Well, you CAN'T have it both ways!

Why is this happening? Obviously, there are many reasons.

Dissatisfaction with the status quo is not necessarily a bad thing. In fact, I often encourage it. However, this is more than dissatisfaction - it is a type of paranoia that it is being fed by two major entities - Fox News and the entire field of GOP Presidential Candidates. Fox News regularly airs reports denying (or at least refuting) the facts of climate change. They regularly feed paranoid fears of race wars and of the government's desire to keep them from protecting themselves by taking their guns. They stoke the flames of hatred by falsely reporting bogus stories like the recent one claiming Planned Parenthood was illegally selling body parts taken from aborted fetuses. And, virtually EVERY ONE of the GOP candidates has fallen in line by taking these inflammatory and false reports and adding them to their platforms. The current leader, Donald Trump, is particularly egregious in feeding that paranoia by using provocative rhetoric and exaggerated, if not blatantly false, language during his stump speeches.

Look, this is still a free Country. And, I guess that's kind of my point. It IS free and it's going to stay that way. We can STILL make choices. Feeding into the fear and loathing that creates paranoia is not a choice I wish to make. Vigilance is good and necessary. Paranoia is fearful and counterproductive.

Which will it be?

* first used by Friedrich Neitzsche