Today's MOZEN: No Doubt

F LoBuono

Doubt is an insidious force. It can work on the human psyche much as water that seeps into a fissure does to the strongest rock. It's hardly noticed at first. After all, what can mere liquid do to solid rock? But, the water is relentless. It works inexorably over time to slowly but assuredly ruin the integrity of the stone. Eventually, the water has its way and the rock is split.

So it is for people. At least it is for me.

Generally, my personality is one that many describe as "Type A". I tend to talk too much and too loudly. Simply put, I can be hard to miss. I've been told by my mother that I have always been this way. And, I see no real reason to change. I know who I am and I like myself. I'm pretty damned good at some things and suck at others. I have a VERY strong sense of myself. Being that way, overall, has served me well. Of course, some people are critical and I understand their reasoning. I could be a better listener and a healthy dose of humility is occasionally necessary. But, I believe that I'm truly at my best when I BELIEVE in myself and my ability to do ANYTHING that I set my mind to (except, perhaps, dunk a basketball).

And, doubt is the enemy of all that.

When I allow doubt to be injected into my mind-set and I lose confidence, I turn into a quivering mass of jelly. Instead of believing that if I do my best the outcome will ALWAYS be positive (and that does NOT always mean being successful), negativity and fear of failure of the most egregious kind dominate my thinking. I don't sleep well. I don't eat well. And, I don't FEEL well. It wears on me like the unrelenting water works on the stone. Over time, I'm bound to crack.

Despite what others may perceive of me, I am a deep thinker and I take things (especially important ones) very seriously. Even though I might sport a confident and jovial appearance, there are times when I am simply racked with doubt: can I do this or that? Am I truly good enough, etc.?  At some point, my thought process can make me appear as a dog chasing its tail - there's a lot action leading no where. So, what's the point?

Having confidence does not mean that you will never fail. But, it does insulate you from the doubt caused by the fear of failure that is so counter productive to getting things done. No one is 100% effective 100% of the time. Therefore, failure from time is to be expected but never feared. If we let doubt and worry drive our wagon, we'll never get anywhere. Knowing that failing is a part of life should be enough to dispel our anxieties. Besides, if you have confidence in yourself and your abilities added to the proper preparation to do a job, chances are you will succeed FAR more often than you will fail. There are few guarantees in life except this one: if you fear failure and let it dominate your thinking, you WILL fail. Doubt and anxiety will rule the day.

Go forth with confidence in everything that you do. You may not be perfect but, if you believe in yourself, you will be pretty damned good more often than not. And, that's good enough for most of us.